Tuesday, July 20, 2010

a letter to Draco Malfoy

Dear Mr. Draco Malfoy,
It is with great regret that we have to inform you of the passing of your pet snake, Pansy Parkinson. She served greatly in battle arms in arms with her fellow men displaying a suicidal bravery one has never witnessed before. It is a great loss to our platoon that she can no longer fight against the nasty men in silver and green. It seemed that her dimwittedness has transgressed to an incurable degree and was certainly without a doubt mentally incapable of fighting another logical fight (not that she ever fought one of such in the first place) but she insisted on dying for your pitiful pride.

My companions who fought along with the saddened state of a troll (I am still perplexed as to why you call it a snake when the sight of it is far too vomit-inducing) said she certainly had a voracious appetite for anything orange and brown resembling a lion even slightly.

I send my deepest apologies and would encourage you to take all of what I said to heart, proceed to cry your heart out drowning in tissues and have a good night rest.

Yours truly,
DA president
Harry James Potter

The result of my inability to write anything legit during class.

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